hipster-trichster:

2makeyewsmile:

Woman: Is there a problem, Officer? Officer: Ma’am, you were speeding. Woman: Oh, I see. Officer: Can I see your license please? Woman: I’d give it to you but I don’t have one.  Officer: Don’t have one? Woman: Lost it 4 times for drunk driving. Officer: I see…Can I see your vehicle registration papers please. Woman: I can’t do that. Officer: Why not? Woman: I stole this car. Officer: Stole it? Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner. Officer: You what? Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see. The Officer looks at the woman, slowly backs away to his car, and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun. Officer 2: Ma’am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle. Woman: Is there a problem sir? Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner. Woman: Murdered the owner? Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please. The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk. Officer 2: Is this your car, ma’am? Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The first officer is stunned. Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license. The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer snaps open the clutch purse and examines the license. He looks quite puzzled. Officer 2: Thank you ma’am, one of my officers told me you didn’t have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner. Woman: Betcha the lying bastard told you I was speeding too.

that was a wild ride

hipster-trichster:

2makeyewsmile:

Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

Officer: Ma’am, you were speeding.

Woman: Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Woman: I’d give it to you but I don’t have one.

Officer: Don’t have one?

Woman: Lost it 4 times for drunk driving.

Officer: I see…Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Woman: I can’t do that.

Officer: Why not?

Woman: I stole this car.

Officer: Stole it?

Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?

Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see.

The Officer looks at the woman, slowly backs away to his car, and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma’am, could you step out of your vehicle
please!

The woman steps out of her vehicle.

Woman: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

Woman: Murdered the owner?

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma’am?

Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.

The first officer is stunned.

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer snaps open the clutch purse and examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: Thank you ma’am, one of my officers told me you didn’t have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

Woman: Betcha the lying bastard told you I was speeding too.

that was a wild ride

(via whathappensonolympustayonolympus)

cherry-dicksicle:

danfreakindavis:

timecourier:

danfreakindavis:

danfreakindavis:

someone help i just ate an entire watermelon and i just cut open a second one

update: i’m out of watermelon

make watermelon clothes

how does one not reblog this

(via percywinchester)

howunpleasant:

friday at school i heard some girl in the hall way scream “FOR THE LAST TIME BITCH IM LESBIAN IM NOT TRYING TO STEAL YOUR BOYFRIEND HE SMELLS LIKE KETCHUP ANYWAYS”

(via aph-nordick)

  • person: i’m bisexual
  • media: you’re coming out as gay
  • person: no, i’m bisexual
  • media: HEY LOOK THIS PERSON IS GAY
  • person: no you see, i’m actually not gay, i’m bisexual
  • media: IT TAKES SO MUCH COURAGE TO COME OUT AS GAY, THIS PERSON IS COMING OUT AS GAY, EVERYONE LOOK, IT’S A GAY PERSON
  • person: seriously though, i specifically said bisexu —
  • media: GGGGGAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

leaveyourkeyinthemailb0x:

see that girl you just called a lesbian? is she? can you help me get her number?

(via tachibanamakato)

fandomopolisindiana:

Well… Idk. I tried a makeup thing. Is it good? Any tips?

“If you acknowledge that you have the potential to be attracted – romantically and/or sexually – to people of more than one sex and/or gender, not necessarily at the same time, not necessarily in the same way, and not necessarily to the same degree, you might be a bisexual. (Credit: Robyn Ochs)”
(via tiggyupland)

Well maybe I’m bi

jackbarafucked:

My school takes pictures and posts them around school for day of silence with the prompt of “I’m silent for” and I rly think they’re amazing jackbarafucked:

My school takes pictures and posts them around school for day of silence with the prompt of “I’m silent for” and I rly think they’re amazing jackbarafucked:

My school takes pictures and posts them around school for day of silence with the prompt of “I’m silent for” and I rly think they’re amazing jackbarafucked:

My school takes pictures and posts them around school for day of silence with the prompt of “I’m silent for” and I rly think they’re amazing jackbarafucked:

My school takes pictures and posts them around school for day of silence with the prompt of “I’m silent for” and I rly think they’re amazing jackbarafucked:

My school takes pictures and posts them around school for day of silence with the prompt of “I’m silent for” and I rly think they’re amazing jackbarafucked:

My school takes pictures and posts them around school for day of silence with the prompt of “I’m silent for” and I rly think they’re amazing jackbarafucked:

My school takes pictures and posts them around school for day of silence with the prompt of “I’m silent for” and I rly think they’re amazing jackbarafucked:

My school takes pictures and posts them around school for day of silence with the prompt of “I’m silent for” and I rly think they’re amazing

jackbarafucked:

My school takes pictures and posts them around school for day of silence with the prompt of “I’m silent for” and I rly think they’re amazing

free-fawn:

You know how men always comment on rape culture posts with, “well men get raped too”, well yes, we understand that, but when men are raped do people ask what he was wearing to “provoke” the rapist? Or say that he was “asking for it” because he was drinking or acting like he wanted it.

I very much doubt it.

juliaedaniel:

this-is-cthulhu-privilege:

[equality intensifies]

Hold up.

Let’s look at this for a sec.

RAPE IS RAPE.
Rape is a noun meaning: the unlawful compelling of a person through physical force or duress to have sexual intercourse.
So yes men can be raped too. When someone is raped, they’re not grateful for someone “fucking their sorry asses”. No, no one is grateful for being raped. That’s why it is a CRIME.
I really hope this picture is a joke, or some representation of something wrong.
Men get raped.
Let that sink in guys, men get raped. Wether it’s often or not, men get raped.
Surprise! Rape is not just woman and man. It can be:
Woman-woman
Man-man
Man-woman
Woman-man
They don’t have to be grateful.
It’s not their fault.
Not all guys rape women.
Not all guys insult or disrespect women.
That’s very gender bias if you think that. And if you do, I’m very sorry. You must be miserable.
Everyone needs to be aware that this is the a new age, gender roles and/or stereotypes are now too simple to describe a girl/boy.
So let’s all open our eyes here. We need equality. Especially with a subject such as rape.

I’m sorry if this picture was a joke, but just for those out there who think like this, rethink your ways.